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Friday, March 30, 2007
10:32 PM

Loneliness.
Is it not fear itself?
Whisper about your lifeless zombies, your invisible ghosts and your fiendish vampires, but deep within Man's heart, almost all of us fear the same thing.
Solitude. The four walls of your mind in a padded cell, where you listen to your own anguish, where you cry for your griefs, where you lament for your sufferings. Alone. Tired.

Yet - is it so bad, really? To be with one's quintessential self; undisturbed. It sometimes baffles me how certain people are deathly afraid of being alone. They cling on desperately to the last shred of company, frantic. To them, loneliness is when the world ends, when their lives crash into black oblivion, wasted across the skies. Bleak do their lives become, when not surrounded by their constant groups of chattering friends.

But everyone is alone. Every day, loneliness pervades our lives, whether we know it or not. So is it worthy of being feared to such extremes, when loneliness is just a part of our lives?

I embrace it. Solitude is my sanctuary, my haven. When your windows to the world are painted ebony black, when you close your eyes to smell the scent of grass, when you hear the calls of croaking frogs and chirping crickets, when you feel nothing and no one but the earth beneath your feet. You cry, but you don't know why. Does the isolation kill you, or heal you? Does deception pool at your feet, as society continues its cruel ways, telling you how to eat, how to think, how to bloody pass motion. Loneliness is a disease, they say with fervent nods but dimming eyes. Destroy it and you will be free.

You smile.
And you give in.


Wednesday, March 14, 2007
8:27 AM

You tell me about its marvels.
You say its the greatest thing to have blessed the lives of cruel Mankind, the most miraculous gift from the celestial gods.

It's friendship, you say.

And I am silent, instead of the revered murmurs of agreement you expect to hear.

Friendship?
Stories have been weaved, lyrics have been sung and lessons have been preached about this mysterious, strangely deceiving little thing.
Call me a fool - and, maybe I am - but I don't buy into it.

Why? Because in the world that I live in, we're all alone.
In this world of darkness and terror, we're all alone.
In this dimension, what are friends? Are they really as they seem, as they are preached about - our guardians, our confidantes who will stand by our side forever?

Does such a being even exist?

Someone so completely altruistic, so benevolent and so understanding? Could you ever, in your lifetime, meet a person who's even half of that?

As you sit by a window and weep to yourself, rocking back and forth as cold rain patters onto the glass, as your heart splinters into a thousand pieces - will she understand; can she understand? Will she be there for you, to hold you and rock you as you slip slowly into the comforting embrace of a deep slumber?

We are alone.
Because no one can understand us, no one can be us. No one can feel your empty loneliness as it creeps onto the walls of your mind, as overwhelms your senses, as you give in to it.
No one can feel your heartbreak and pain, as you whittle away your days in the grasps of sorrow.

No one feel these things, except ourselves.

And these people, they will not be there to save us. Should the day come when they have to make a choice between their family and you - well, it is almost certain that they will choose their family.

Who will save you then?

Your family. Your family, whose blood runs through your veins, whose flesh and bone you are born from.

Your family will save you.


Tuesday, March 06, 2007
12:49 PM

Tell me how love is supposed to feel.

Have you ever been in love? Out of love? Loved by another? Have you ever felt - that golden warmth gurgling inside, like flaxen bubbles surfacing and bursting through a sea of champagne. The feeling of voids of endless joy; the feeling of happiness as it trails its way down your back, pleasantly. You shiver, but you smile.

Tell me: Why do people shun this incredible feeling, why do peoply shut it out? Why do people forget its existence; while hatred paves its way throught their minds.
It's as if they've forgotten how to live. What is life, if not a chance to bask in the resplendence of love?

Sometimes, I die.
Darkness and death embalmed, I lie. The world fades, the lights dim. I am alone, but for that speck of life in the distance. Murmurs of the passing world filter through, but I ignore them. I resist them with strange fierceness, as the world's sudden insignificance echoes in my mind. For nothing matters more than me having my black silence.
But all this - only for a moment. Before I let myself wake up.

And I am brought to life, where I feel the grandeur of empowering love stronger than ever. It emanates from my loved ones, in waves and golden auras. I feel it in the grass beneath my feet, the love of Mother Nature who has so beautifully crafted our world.

I cry, for these things of which I live for, embracing them. I cry, silver tears of gratitude and joy, for the beauty of this magnificent gift that has blessed all Mankind.

Then I stand up to face the cruel world of coldness, with a smile on my face and love by my side.


profile.

rachel sim.
seven-oh one-ninety three.
fifteen.
scgs.
rafflesian!
guitar ensemble!
blogskinner bubblewrap.
loves her guitars.
loves her books.
loves music, both oldies and contemporaries.

loves maroon 5, my chemical romance, coldplay, mcfly, deathcab for cutie, queen, clay aiken, five for fighting, the eagles, elvis.

loves stardust, star wars, lotr, v for vendetta, babel, romeo and juliet, emma, gone with the wind, CRASH, Moulin Rouge, Breakfast at Tiffany's, The Pianist, Back to the Future, Walk the Line, The Departed

loves friends. and chandler bing.

loves david rocco, nigella lawson and JAMIE OLIVER.

links.
Renee
Sara
Rachel Tio
Bala
Bala's other blog
Jessica Chan
Rachel
Natalie
Joy
Joy's other blog
Joelle
Chloe
Denise
Ling Li
Si Yuan
Michelle Teo
Judith
Zeshan
Clara
Stephanie
Lynnie
Trisha
Val
Jiahui
Pan-e
Miss Goh
6sy blog

;raffles
104'06

104 blog
Cheryl(PSL)
Charlene(PSL)
Xian Ying(SPSL)
Ada(PSL)
Liting
April
Priscilla
Wen Yan
Jenny
Jessica
Sam
Qianyu
Rachel Ang
Huizi
Duxuan
Tienli

;205'07

Jiahe
Wan Ting
Irina
Kimberlyn
Natasha
Claire
Diyanah
Ivalyn
Danetta
Amanda
Izabel
Christine
Cheryl
205

;RGGE

Anna
Priya
Ying Jie
Val
Amanda

;307'08

Peixin

Preservation of the English Language League



tag.